Fresh worries and the Creator

The end of five months came and with it the same worries fresh.

Digital numbers on display. A baby on the scale. He's growing!

But is it *enough*?

Is it ever enough?

Three babies born to us, and never do they gain quite the way I hope... never are all doubts quenched. All questions quieted.

Then come the gentle words, again... the baby, look at the baby. Not the charts.

Not the charts. But how can I ignore? How can I but compare? What else do I know?

The baby. A mother of three, still I flounder. I stare long, mind empty. I don't know. I expect some sort of understanding. It doesn't come.

I say I don't compare. Each child is different. But I do. Not to my oldest. Not to my girl. But to hundreds of thousands of others.


Look at the baby. This baby. My baby.

How can he be behind in pounds and ounces, yet perfect in every other way?

How can he be behind in pounds and ounces, yet ahead in diapers and laundry? (So far ahead!)

Look at the baby! This baby. Not his baby or her baby or all of those babies... My baby.

Look at the smiles, the laughs, the eyes. Hear the laughs, the cries, the squeals. Wipe the spit-up, change the diapers, wash the laundry.

My baby.

I look to the Creator of the baby, not the maker of the charts. With that, He calms all my questions. Soothes all my fears.

And He'll be there to do it again tomorrow, and next week, and next month... until finally I trust. Until finally I remember.

Labels: Breastfeeding, Gratitude, Little Moments, Raising Children

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 3:02 PM