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Part 3... in which I am harsh

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Chasing Babies... Growing in Grace: Part 3... in which I am harsh

Friday, January 13, 2012

Part 3... in which I am harsh

This is where I'd like to blend this "part 2" post about depression with my Suzy meets Proverbs 31 post.  And why?  Because the message is the same.

Stop being lazy, get up, and do your job!

Harsh?  Maybe.  But it's as much to myself as it is to you.

Why are our houses, children and lives a mess?  Because we're not doing our jobs.

Have you ever thought about what life would be like if our husbands did their work the way we do ours?  They'd surely be fired and we'd be without income, food, and possibly even home.  Imagine.

If you were back out in the work force, chances are your employer wouldn't care that your kids are sick (or you for that matter), the work still needs to be done.  We are so blessed to be working for our husbands, but how often do we take their love and patience with us for granted?  Too often.

Your home, your children, all the meals, etc... those are your job.  And the only way to feel the satisfaction in your work is for you to do them.  If you do well, will you not be accepted?

Leaving these undone, or even leaving them for someone else to do will eventually lead to depression... if not marital problems!  And this just compounds itself with each new day of laziness.

Now, don't let this put you further into depression and despair.  It would be easy to do, I know.  I've pointed out failure.  You feel it (I often do).  And it's all your fault.  These things may be true, but the answer is not to let it go on.  The answer is to do something about it.  But you certainly will not be able to do something about it on your own.  You must first seek Him!  Worship.  Find a piece of paper or your journal and make a list of everything you have to be thankful for.

Now, with the little bit of energy that gives you, get up!  Make that bed, fold up the blanket on the couch.  Fluff pillows.  And don't sit back down.  Push through.  Recite that list of thankful things if you need to.  Ask God for every step you must take... literally!

Then start small.  Go clear off the kitchen table.  Move all those dishes from the last couple days to the sink (or counter around it if it's full).  It seems like a big job, but just moving dishes isn't so bad.  You can do it. Find a clean wash cloth and get it wet.  Wipe off that cleared table.  Get it cleared all the way!  Is there clutter piled up there too???  I love this method of clearing a space!!!  (Her methods of cleaning are great in general!... I'll be reading over them again myself.)

Now you have a cleared table.  Just look at it.  Let the absence of visual clutter energize you a little bit.  Don't give up.  It's so easy to sit back down and read another blog post now, but it will trap you again.  Move to that kitchen sink.  You don't have to wash them right now.  Tell yourself that.  You're just going to organize them for later.  Rinse them and sort into piles on the counter.  I find that once dishes are all organized, they never look as bad as they did.  Do you have a dishwasher???  Put them right in there instead of stacking on the counter.  Then the job is done!  Fill it once and stack the rest, but empty that sink!

Now... you don't have to do this next part right away (but sometimes I find that I can just use the momentum I've already created and go for it), but start with some of the dishes.  Don't fill the sink with soapy water if that's seems too big a job.  Just put some soap on the brush or cloth and tackle one stack of bowls or plates or flatware.  Just one.  Move them to the other side of the sink.  When that stack is done, rinse and set in the dish drainer.  Can you do just one more stack?  A few cups?  That one pan?  Just keep doing them as long as you can.   Anything you can do will be better!  And then look at all you've accomplished.  YOU accomplished.  YOU did it!  YOURSELF!  Thank God for the ability to do something today.  This was your first step!

But what if kids are all over the place and you can't stop to do so much?  Wait till nap time, set up something for them to color on that newly cleared table, or ask that person (grandma, friend, husband, etc.) who has been helping you because you just couldn't do it alone if they will play with the kids for a while so you can tackle this job.  Don't let them do the job for you... you have to do the cleaning.  It's important that it be your work that brings order.

Keep picking at those dishes until they are gone.  If you stop to rest because you just can't do more now, set a timer and rest for 15 minutes.  Read a book to the kids, watch them perform tricks on the floor, close your eyes, read your Bible or another book, or work on that list of thankful things.  Include on that list that you cleared the table!!!  That you pushed through and did your job!  How exciting!!!

Monday I intend to have a next step for you if you still struggle to know how to break through this depression to conquer your home.  If it's all just too overwhelming!

But what will I do all weekend?  It's just going to fall apart again!

No, it won't.  Your job over the weekend is to keep picking at those dishes and to keep up with them.  Don't let meals get you down, or laundry, or messes other places.  Spend your time in the kitchen if you need to.  Just work on keeping up with what you've started.  Do those dishes right after meals!  Now that the room is in some bit of order, include the kids in clearing the table.  Even a 2 year old can clear their own cup to the sink or counter.  Make it your goal to start Monday morning with all the dishes washed.

And I wonder what else you may be able to tackle once all those dishes are clean and put away.  Perhaps you'll be surprised by the energy to wipe down the counter, or the stove.  Or to declutter the counter top the way you did the table.  But you don't have to... this weekend, just keep those dishes clean and that table cleared between meals and use.  It's not that much... and if you fall behind, start again the way you did today.  You can do it!!

I'm praying for you!!!!

Part 4: The Next Step

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