Treatment and what it means

My head shook slightly when I began to see what My Beloved was thinking, but inside I was ready to burst.   

No.  It's not an option.  No formula.  She's so little.  Why can't we just use the same treatment we used last summer when I was nursing Little Man?  

I stared sadly into his eyes, my head barely moving... but just enough.  Inside the pressure was mounting, daring tears to come.  

---

So I'd been diagnosed and our doctor gave me a prescription for "nursing friendly" antibiotics.  I'm not fond of taking anything while nursing, but I'm learning to pick my battles.  Then I learned that there was serious talk of trying a different approach to treatment... one that meant I wouldn't be able to nurse.  Maybe for a couple months.  Heartbroken I prayed.  And prayed.  And prayed.

First of all, I don't like commercial formulas.  But beyond that, I don't want to give up nursing.  I LOVE nursing my babies!  I know it's best for them and I simply love it.

Still, bad antibiotics loomed.  The best treatments were being researched.  What would hit this Lyme thing in the bud???  Get it while it's still early?

The decision was all but made.  I knew I'd be starting a bad for baby antibiotic in a matter of days, so I started looking at what I could do.  I did some research into homemade baby formula.  My Beloved told me to price it out.  It's not cheap, but over several months it works out cheaper than buying commercial formula... and it's healthier... and doesn't have BPA in it.  We'll see.

I wished and wished I felt okay about asking friends for breast milk.  Something just seemed weird about it, yet I remembered reading about another blogger who had friends bring over breast milk while she was on crazy antibiotics.  That didn't seem weird.  It seemed... wonderful!

Then Thursday morning My Beloved called from work to tell me he had a prescription for the dreaded antibiotic in his hand (our doctor works at his office).  Ten days worth.  My heart sank.  I had begun pumping as much as I could in the last couple days, wishing I had pumped all along and had a nice supply in the freezer for emergencies (hindsight, as they say, is 20/20), but I didn't have more than 8 or so ounces.  No where near the 360 ounces I would need for 12 days of pumping and dumping due to antibiotics.  

Suddenly I didn't feel weird about asking my friends anymore.  I called first to see if they had any stores in their freezers.  We didn't want to ask them to take their time or resources to pump extra just for us.  There was a little in the freezer, but not much.  But both precious friends volunteered to pump for me.  One friend was about to drop a feeding anyway for her 11 month old and volunteered to pump that feeding.  What a blessing.  Another friend (who had her baby the week Belle was born) also volunteered to pump for me, between feedings.

I was (and am) praying the Lord will multiply what they are able to pump for me so that I don't have to use formula.  I know he can do it.  But if He chooses not to, I will praise Him still! 


So far
I began day one yesterday.  I was able to put off my first dose until 10:30 yesterday morning, allowing me to get in two nursings before I had to start pumping.  This helped stretch what was pumped already.

At around 12:30, Belle took her first ever bottle.  Five ounces.  She did great!

Just before 4, I mixed the rest of my milk with milk pumped by a friend.  She took between 4-5 ounces again. 

We were out at 7:30 when she took her first unwarmed bottle, but she did great again.

And her last bottle at 10:30.

Since Thursday night we've had one drop off of milk and two pick ups. 

I'll be feeding the last of what I have on hand to Belle as soon as she wakes up from this nap.  I don't know if I will have pumped milk before her 4 o'clock feeding or not.  If not, we'll give the first of commercial formula (it's all we have for now) at that time.

I'm praying we won't have to do it, but God, in His grace, has reminded me of something this week.  He cares more about my heart in this situation than he does about what Belle eats.  He can and will provide for and protect Belle in this time of need. 

I'm praying for the breast milk, but if we come through this whole thing without ever having to give formula and my heart is not closer to my Lord's, it was all vanity!

Labels: As it happens..., Lyme Disease, Raising Children

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 12:55 PM