Belle's Birthstory ~ Part 4

Miss parts 1, 2, or 3?


My midwife had stepped out to the bathroom quickly before it was time to start.  It was while she was gone that I felt the urge to push.  But I was nervous to do so.  I wasn't sure like I was when Little Man was born.  I breathed through that contraction, urging my nurse, now Bethany, that we needed Barb (the midwife) fast!  Sensing my urgency after I said something the second time, she headed out to find her.  As she stepped around the curtain, and out the door, Barb came around the other side. 

She checked me again and I was ready.  I pushed with the next contraction.  I struggled, tired, to do the best I knew I could do.  I needed to roll over, assume "the position."  Time was short as another contraction was upon me.  My sweet husband was holding the freshly rinsed out basin in case I should need it again, but I wanted -- needed -- him to support my let.  Poor guy!  For lack of words, I grabbed it from him and threw it over his shoulder.  I guess I was feeling a bit desperate.

I pushed through one, maybe two more contractions, and she was here.  They laid her on me, skin to skin, while drying her with a towel and doing all those little checks they do. 

20.5 inches long

In a few minutes she was nursing, latched herself right on.  They put a little hat over her head of dark hair and tucked us in with a nice warm blanket.  All the while my midwife worked and waited to deliver the placenta, forgoing the Pitocin shot at my request.  My sweet girl just lay there in my arms nursing more than an hour before I finally let them have her to weigh and bathe.  But even all that was done right in my room.  9 pounds, 9 ounces.  20 1/2 inches long.

After getting cleaned up myself, I felt well enough to take over photographer duties... for which My Beloved was grateful.  He was tired, hungry and hurting.  His knees were sore from all the standing the last couple hours.

First bath

Once things calmed down and the nurses had left us, we had to decide on a name.  Poor guy@  After a few minutes, he didn't care any more.  We were narrowed down to two and he just said to pick one.  Of course I wanted him to be happy with the decision.  Finally it was final. (Though I would go on to second guess that decision through the night.

My Beloved headed home to an empty house with blessing from me to sleep in -- his only chance for a nice long, un-bothered night rest in a long time and fore a long time.  He would get the kids back tomorrow.

It was just me and my baby girl now.  Midnight.

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 6:02 AM 1 Comments

Belle's Birthstory ~ Part 3

Did you miss parts 1 and 2?


While the nurse was helping me get comfortable on my side and getting the monitors hooked up, there was a knock at the door... and a man's voice.  My Beloved went to answer it (since I was not decent at that moment) and I asked the nurse to make sure I was covered up in back.  It was our pastor and his wife with missionary friends who would be leaving in the morning.  My Beloved talked with them in the hall for a moment while Nicole worked to locate and keep the baby's heart beat in the monitor.

She did find it, but only if a bit of pressure was applied.  "I wonder if your husband would be willing to hold this?" She asked... so I called to him. Once he was settled on the bed next to me, we invited our visitors in.  Not the most opportune time, but sweet of them to want to come since they were leaving in the morning.

We visited a couple minutes, then Pastor said they wouldn't stay, but "let's pray."  Just at that moment, a contraction came.  "Oh, could you wait a sec?" I asked, closing my eyes.  And then as it ended, "Okay, let's do this!"  I was feeling urgency to have them done and gone before the next contraction.

While he prayed, I started feeling the slightest bit sick and I focused hard not to be.  As they left, my friend said something about hoping it would be soon.  "I want to push that button before you get to the parking lot," I joked, only sort of joking.

They they were gone, and before they reached the double doors by the nurses station, I told My Beloved that I was going to be sick.  He moved quickly from behind me, bringing the basin he had all ready for this moment (I'm always sick in transition!)  He brought it just in time!  Between heaves (sorry for TMI) and surely before my visitors were in the elevator, I squeaked out a quiet "push the button".

A nurse clicked through, but never even asked what we needed.  No doubt they could hear me.  They clicked right back off and my nurse and midwife were there in a moment.

Like much of my labor, this transition was different than the others.  I didn't experience tremors or extreme heat and sweating.  I even felt fine again after.  Very discouraging as I felt like I was going backward, not making progress.  I took the nurses advice to try a different position, but when the contraction began on my hands and knees, I didn't like it.  I was relieved to be on my right side by the time the next contraction came.  My midwife stepped out to use the bathroom before it would be time to start. 

It was while she was gone that I felt the urge to push.

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 5:41 AM 0 Comments

Belle's Birthstory ~ Part 2

Did you miss part 1???


I made the scary decision to walk in from the parking lot, and again, I was grateful (though also a little concerned) that no very intense contractions came while we walked.  My Beloved hit the speaker button when we arrived at the double doors on the third floor and a lady's voice asked if she could help us.  Before My Beloved could answer, I said, "I'm having a baby."  Without a word, they hit the buzzer and the doors swung open.  "That's the password," one of them said as we approached the nurses station.

I was delighted to recognize the nurse in the little per-admitting room.  The same nurse, Nicole, from Little Man's birth.  I got changed and settled.  They hooked up the monitor and then my midwife stepped in to check me.  Six centimeters dilated, 80% effaced and station 0.  Not bad.  And it was only 2:30pm.  When Sweet Pea was born, we were only in the hospital a couple hours before she was born, so surely this wouldn't take much longer.

After having learned my "it's better to change positions regularly" lesson with Little Man, I was determined to move around as much as I could this time.  Once I was in our room and the monitors were off, we got me up and out of bed.  Laying down, it seemed, slowed contractions a bit, but once I was walking around the room, I was sitting down for another contraction every couple minutes.

My back pain continued to get worse during contractions, making the chair I was using uncomfortable.  I tried leaning forward over the bed from the chair, but that wasn't working either.  They brought the birthing ball in and we tried that.  It allowed My Beloved to sit behind me on a stool to push on and rub my lower back while I learned forward on the bed, but I still wasn't comfortable.  When I could tell it wasn't working and the contraction was intensifying, I leaned back on My Beloved instead.  That was wonderful!

I had thought, the previous week, how nice it might be to have him behind me for part of labor, supporting me in that extra way.  But I hadn't figured out how to make it work.  This ball-stool combo was perfect.  I could walk around between contractions, then sit on the ball and lean back into his arms and between his legs with my shoulders and head resting on his body during contractions.  Then, he'd easily help me back up when it was done.  And, the best part is that it also reduced the back pain greatly!

Time passed and I was getting tired.  A good sign, I thought.  Perhaps entering more active labor.  My Beloved turned out the lights, leaving the window blinds open, and I settled onto my right side.  I lay there comfortably, even dozing between contractions, for I don't know how long.  My Beloved played a game on his iPhone. 

"Uh oh," the nurse said when she came in to check on me.  "Why are the lights off?"  I think she took it as a good sign.  My Beloved reported that contractions were every 2-4 minutes and running 1.5-2 minutes long.  All this he'd noted through observation because I wasn't talking much.

After a while though, I became restless, so we got me back up to walk around and use the ball and My Beloved through contractions.  All through the afternoon came offers to check me again and to break my water.  I was not interested.  I didn't want to be checked just for the sake of knowing, and I was afraid breaking my water would increase the intensity of my contractions (as it did with Tornado's birth) and I'd still have hours to labor.

Then my midwife came in.  "That looks too comfortable," she said to me, reclining on My Beloved from the ball when she came in.  She gave some suggestions for leaning and rocking that can help baby move or turn as well as help with back labor.

Then she explained that she had three mammas all in about the same place and wanted to check to see where I was at so she could see where she might be needed first.  So back into bed I climbed.  Eight centimeters, 95%, and still 0 station.  Not what I'd hoped to hear.  It was around 8 pm -- but better than no progress at all.

While I was in bed, my nurse wanted to put me on the monitor for 15 minutes just to see how the baby was doing.  I was not comfortable sitting/reclining back though, so she said she could set up the monitors with me laying on my side.  Perfect!  I wanted to try laying on my left side anyway. 

While I was getting situated and she was getting the straps on, there was a knock on the door... and a man's voice.  It was Pastor and his wife with missionary friends of ours... here only for tonight.

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 3:50 PM 0 Comments

Belle's Birthstory ~ Part 1

39 weeks... the last picture of my pregnancy.

 
Contractions were beginning again.  Like the other night.  Like last week.  I didn't dare expect it to mean anything.  We were at church.  It was Sunday morning.  I felt... ichy.

The contractions came and went, some of them just more discomfort than anything.  I was definitely uncomfortable.  Still I didn't think labor.  Cramping... ichiness... yes.  But not necessarily labor. 

It was half way through the service, juggling three children, who weren't sitting still, by myself (while My Beloved ran the sound board) that I first really wondered if I could be in labor.  I didn't want to be there.  I wanted to cry.  To curl up and sleep.  "Hmm..." I thought, "That sounds a bit like labor."

Still the service continued.  At one point Little Man was laying backward and upside down on the seat beside me, but I wasn't going to fight it.  The contraction was too intense.  Once it stopped, I regrouped the kids.

All the time I tried to hide possible signs of labor from those around me who might notice.  If the contractions were simply going to stop again, I didn't want people expecting anything.

We made our way, slowly, to the car after the service, walking with friends who had a bag of unused newborn things for us.  My Beloved was so sweet to take the highway home, avoiding the many turns, curves and bumps of the "back" way we usually take.  Once home, I took up my place on the couch while that wonderful man of mine covered lunch and kids.

I folded some laundry and we began officially tracking contractions -- coming 3-5 minutes apart.  As the kids ate their lunch, My Beloved called the friends who would be taking care of our kids while we were at the hospital, letting them know it might be time.  Contractions had been coming 2-5 minutes apart for a least 45 minutes, not counting all during church.  I was glad he'd called.  They were out for lunch and said they'd wrap up and be over in 30 minutes.

When Tornado (5) finished his lunch, I had him join me in the kids room.  I sat on the bed and he gathered various things (clothes, shoes, jammies, special blankets, etc.) for me to pack up for them over night.  He loaded the washer with laundry too, and was simply overjoyed to be helping Mommy.  As I laid everything in the duffel bag, he told me "I'll close the zipper for you so you won't have to use your muscles."  He was very aware of my contractions.  It was precious!

In the living room, Daddy had placed the car seats, bringing out Tornado's new booster seat and resizing his old car seat for Little Man (19 months).  Little Man was still there... strapped in.  He didn't want to get out.

Daddy had called the doctor, and he now called us back, giving the go ahead to come to the Birthplace.

Our friends arrived with their kids, having packed up the remains of their lunch.  I sat down with B to explain the few things I thought would be helpful... disposable diapers, putting Little Man on the potty, Tornado's inhaler, bedtime routines, etc.  They would need to get the extra seat of their van for everyone to fit, so we left them all at our house to sort out the details and we headed to the hospital... the back way.  Oops.  Weren't even thinking about it.  Gratefully, not many contractions came during the curvy places.  This had me wondering... was it really labor after all?

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 6:44 AM 1 Comments

Introducing...

Our forth blessing from the Lord (yet to be given a blog name) was born Sunday night, March 18th at 9pm.  She weighed 9 pounds 9 ounces and was 20.5 inches long. 

I'm working on the detailed birth story... but the short versions starts during church with kids bouncing all over me and ends hours later than we had hoped (because I'm spoiled). :)  But the end is joy!

Thanks for your many prayers!

I'll pop in and out I'm sure, but may not be at my computer much in the days to come.  I do have an exciting guest post I'll share next week!  Stay tuned!

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy, Raising Children

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 10:48 AM 4 Comments

I'm SO ready...

...to use these!

Have you seen these??? 

I designed them back before Sweet Pea was born... and then made some boy ones when I was expecting Little Man. 

They have helped tremendously with each newborn (I used a boring version with Tornado, so I've done this three times and what a blessing!)

They help keep track of feedings, as well as wet and poopy diapers so us breastfeeding mamas can keep track of whether those babies are getting enough to eat!  Does anyone else worry about this... every. time.?

Here's a little sample of how I use them...


If you bottle feed, just put the number of ounces in the "feedings" boxes instead of the "R" and "L".  Works the same... though the colors of poop your looking for may be different on that first week.  I don't really know how that works with formula.  Sorry!


If you want them yourself, just click below and you can download your own!!

         

Oh, one more little tip... the boxes that are colored in are the minimums as are recommended in the book Babywise.  Definitely talk to your doctor about what your baby should be doing!



I'd love to know if you use them!!!

Labels: Getting Ready for Baby, Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 3:30 PM 0 Comments

For all who are wondering...

No, baby girl did not come on Leap Day... nor yesterday. 

My mom called me a watched pot.  Was she trying to encourage me???  Hmmm...

But there is still plenty I can do... and I don't expect her to come this early anyway. 

Truth be told, even though I'll welcome her whenever she comes, I'd kinda like to wait till next weekend anyway.  You see, we missed our window.  Yes, I feel a little like the space shuttle.  But it's true.  We missed our window, and the next window doesn't open again until March 9th (or 10th?). 

Had our baby come on or before February 28th, we had the perfect friends ready and willing to take our other three children while I labor.  But now, and until next weekend, they are in Florida.  I do finally have a back up plan, but I'm not as comfortable with it.  So... we'll see when this little one comes, but I'm ok with another week. 

Sort of. :)

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 1:38 PM 0 Comments

Wouldn't it be cool...

Only recent pic of Baby Girl

Wouldn't it be cool if I had the baby today?  I mean, for a few reasons. 

First of all, who doesn't blame me for being ready to hold the baby on the outside... sounds (and from experience, is) way more comfortable! 

Second, I really want an Amethyst for my necklace.  I already have a March birthstone on there... and while I will gladly take another, the purple would be nice too!

But really, wouldn't it just bee so cool to have a baby on Leap Day?  Ok... not everyone thinks so.  But I think it would be just dandy!  Just think... we could celebrate February 28th and March 1st three out of four years.  Who wouldn't want that? :)

In reality though, I am content with however much time I still have with my three littles... and Sweet Pea's birthday quilt is NOT done.  In fact, I'm going to go work on that right now.  :)

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 1:55 PM 2 Comments

"Never" been like this before

The last days of my wait for Little Man

Three or four (or more?) weeks ago I began having decent contractions.  The feel real kind.  The kind where I just need to sit down and relax my body to get through it kind.  The "don't touch me" kind... or the "I just need a minute" kind.  The kind where my tall 5 year old bumping into me in the thrift store during it just about sends me over.

Also, about three or four weeks ago, I began saying something to the affect of: "it's never been like this before... not this early... not this regularly."

And I believed it too.  And as far as I can remember... it's still true.

But then today I stumbled on an old blog post.  One that I found very encouraging.  But also one that showed how very poorly we women carrying babies can remember anything.  At. All.

So, now... with only 3ish weeks to go (or 5... whatever), I can know that, yes, indeed, constant contractions for the last couple months of pregnancy are pretty normal.  Just one more joy of pregnancy! :)

Click over to see God's grace in it all!

Labels: As it happens..., Life Lessons for Mommy, Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 1:38 PM 0 Comments

Productivity

Tornado's getting more freedom outside.  Here he is right at the edge of the {shallow} creek.

I took a personal challenge to be "as productive as possible" today, and while I wouldn't say I was "as productive as possible", I did make some choices that made me more productive than some days.

I took a nap.  (Oh, and I burned bread.  Not at the same time.) 

It's way more productive than reading blogs or wandering the house aimlessly!


Now if only the kids had actually taken their nap while I slept!

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy, Raising Children

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 3:56 PM 0 Comments

8 weeks

My fav pic from my first pregnancy... don't really have any yet of this one.  I guess I should work on that.

Wow... every week seems to pass faster and faster!  I have to say, this pregnancy has flown by!  At least from where I sit now.   Just yesterday I was telling My Beloved that there are only 9 weeks to go and I have so much I still want to accomplish before baby gets here.  Oh wait... no, yesterday I was telling him there are only 8 weeks to go and I still have so much I want to accomplish!

It makes me a little nervous sometimes.  I admit!

I was mentioning a few of those things I'd like to get done to a real life friend in an email just now and I kept coming up with things.  Finally I just stopped, though I know there are more.

Let's see... what were those?

• meals in the freezer
• numerous sewing projects (since I may not get around to sewing again for a while)
• finishing the de-clutter/home organization I've been working on
• assembling the bassinet (this one can be done while I'm in the hospital if need be)
• organizing baby clothes
• determining what baby clothes and such we still need before she's here
• figuring out a new dresser/kid clothes storage solution (4 kids in one room, one dresser with 5 working drawers)

Like I said... I know there are more.  And the "numerous sewing projects" is hardly fair.  To be fair and realistic, I should at least list out generalities.

Oh... and have I mentioned that Sweet Pea's birthday is the week before I'm due?  Arrangements and such need to be made for that for sure... and early too, just in case baby is early!

Then there is the room that needs to be made in the freezer so there is room for said meals to be put into.  You know, things like the cherry pie filling that needs to be made with all those sour cherries we just stuck in the freezer for later... and the berries in there waiting to be made into jam.  Maybe we can tackle some of that canning stuff this weekend so I can work on cooking next week.  :)

I'm feeling the need to keep an up to date list in my sidebar!  I'll see if I can work on that here sometime too.

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 3:23 PM 1 Comments

21 weeks down, ??? to go! (Oh, and some news!)

Anyone else know what I'm talking about?  They tell us our "due date"... but I'm convinced that's simply the day not to expect baby to come!

But the 21 weeks along part is true... probably. :)

All that said, I figure I should share a bit about pregnancy these days... since I haven't mentioned it in a while.

Sweet little hand next to face

First of all... it's great!  I can't remember enjoying pregnancy... ever.  I don't generally like it at all.  Maybe I'm just forgetting the good parts because they are the times I can do normal things, but I don't know.  What I do know is that I feel great.  (I should probably state as an aside that this does not necessarily mean I wasn't throwing up in the grocery store parking lot the other night on our way to pick up Chinese... nor does it mean that My Beloved was especially thrilled about that at the time.  Or still really.  But overall, I feel great!)  Except for the largeness in my middle... I may as well not be pregnant. 

A profile

 Oh, that's not exactly true.  For just the other day, I felt this little life move within!  I've been waiting and waiting for that.  They say 2nd, 3rd, and 4th (etc., etc.) pregnancies you can usually feel earlier because you know what to expect.  Um... not me apparently!  But finally... the little flutters of life growing in me.  Sigh. :)

And... this morning I had my big ultrasound! And...

It's a girl!

I'll admit that I was hoping for a girl... even up the score, you know.

But really, I think I'm just excited to know.  Sigh.  I like to know!

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 10:50 AM 1 Comments

Where I am now and how I got there

Don't miss the background to this story and my little test of faith.  

I'm doing better and better with this "new" realization of baby number four every day.  Whereas initially I was terribly embarrassed about the thought of four children (like it's this huge shame on our family???) and being pregnant "again!", God has been slowly changing my whole mindset.  To the way it was before.

Like I said.  I always wanted a big family.  And the more I read around the web, the more I want as many kids as the Lord will bless us with.  So what happened?  I can only say that Satan saw a weakness and began spinning his lies on unsuspecting me. 

So how did it all change?  What helped me turn my corner?

One Sunday helped me turn my corner.  Sadly, I don't remember what the one man in our Sunday school said that first made me stop and think... but it was awesome.  IF ever I do remember, I'll be sure to tell you, as I had big plans to do before waking one morning the realization that I could no longer remember what it was.  :(

The other big help came that same morning, while, in tears, I shared with another lady in our Sunday school about our pregnancy.  And how I can barely manage the three I already have... how can I do one more?  Especially an infant.

She shared something from John Piper. He was counseling with a man who was overwhelmed and just couldn't do it anymore.  So Piper asked him, "You can't do it anymore, but can you get through the next eight hours?"  "Well, yeah, sure.  I can get through the next eight hours."  "Okay then, let's just get through the next eight hours." 

Wow.  In the middle of my own selfish pity party, I had forgotten the simple lesson of Matthew 6:34 ~ "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Each day certainly does.  And I was looping my exhaustion (from Lyme's Disease and early pregnancy), morning sickness, children's misbehavior, etc. etc... today, with the exhaustion, heavy work load, projected behavior issues, etc. etc.... later.  Of course I can't do all that!  And God doesn't even intend for me to worry about it all.  

Can I get through today?  Sure, it may not go smoothly, but I can get through it.  


So I'll just keep getting through today... one day at a time.  


Once that weight was off my shoulders (and heart), the panic lost it's hold, my vision cleared and my faith could return.  




More to come... Is a big family really all that bad?

Labels: Life Lessons for Mommy, Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 5:19 PM 2 Comments

A test of faith

Don't miss the background story.


June was a rough month for our family... for me.  Lyme's Disease had knocked me off my feet in the early days and had kept me there throughout.   My mother in law was here with us in those early days, then my mom was here.  They played with the kids and kept up with the house while I lay around, for nearly four weeks!.  This was the last thing I'd expected at the end of the month.

I knew right away, but it was a few days before I shared my inklings with My Beloved.  Deep down I was hoping it wasn't really true.  That with a couple more days I wouldn't have to tell him.  But deep down I knew better.  I was pregnant.  

My mom was here still, but we didn't say anything.  To anyone.  Not even each other.  It wasn't real yet if we didn't talk about it.  And maybe... maybe it wasn't real.  Maybe my antibiotics or the Lyme's Disease were causing this false alarm.  Maybe.  But we still knew better.

It was three weeks before we bought and took a test.  It came up from time to time in those days, but only briefly.  We told no one.  Still I kept thinking that until I saw that word, I could be wrong.  And I really didn't want to make that kind of announcement and be wrong.  So we waited.  And then there it was.  Clear as anything.

It was real.  I breathed a deep sigh and went back to bed.  It was real now.  We didn't say anything in church that morning.

Deep within me I struggled.  I did want more children, but not now.  Not yet.  My baby isn't yet one.  I'm still nursing.  I'm having a hard enough time with the three I have now.

Slowly over the next few weeks we told more and more people... close friends, parents, and eventually our pastor, church and email list at large.  Then you.   

But nothing really changed for me in this time... except that my "morning" sickness was getting worse and worse everyday.  I knew I wanted this baby, but at the same time, I struggled with feeling like I didn't want this baby... not right now.  To be honest with you, there were many times and many days in those weeks (month+) that I didn't want the ones I already had.  I watched my sister in law change a diaper while we were in Michigan and I horribly thought of how I didn't want to care for an infant again.  I struggled through discouragement, depression to some extent, and moments of despair.  The tiniest part of me was thrilled to get to have another little one.  The rest of me was (and sometimes still is) terrified.

How could I feel this way?  How could I hope it wasn't true?  How can I be, dare I say it, embarrassed?  Do I not think this should be God's decision?  Do I not believe that He is sovereign and trustworthy?  Do I not believe that children are a blessing of the Lord?

I smiled and accepted the congratulations as we shared our news with each new person, but inside I was cringing.  How would I do this?  I can't even handle the three I have.  How can I insert a newborn, and the schedule and sleep depravity it ensues, into this. 

Several ladies received our news without the thin veil that usually held back my tears.  But then I only felt ashamed at my lack of faith.  Is my God not still God of the universe?  Is He not the one who gives the grace for every moment?  Do I not trust Him with the details of my life?

I was shocked to find that, for all my talk, I didn't.



Still to come... Where I'm at now and how I got there.


(Photos:  In lieu of pics that matched my post, these are a few that make me smile.)

Labels: Life Lessons for Mommy, Pregnancy, Reflections

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 8:49 PM 3 Comments

A little background

I've always wanted a big family. I'm not sure what started that dream, or when, but I remember talking about it with My Beloved before we were even engaged. Five seemed like a good number to both of us.

I'm not sure what fed that number, or where it came from. Five.

Then I was pregnant a mere 15 months into our marriage. I was ready sooner. My Beloved could have waited longer. We decided after we'd been married a year to just let whatever happen... happen. All of a sudden the realities of even one baby came crashing into our lives. Pregnancy. Ugh. I was sick all. the. time. for 8 months. Then I got some time off (for good behavior?) and was sick again in labor. And let's just say that the other "discomforts" of pregnancy weren't winning anyone over in this household. I'm definitely not one of those glowing, easy pregnancy women. At all.

Then that sweet baby was born. With nursing and weight gain issues. Not to mention the month long recovery time for me after the birth. So far, we were 0 for 2 on the "pleasurable experience" scale as far as My Beloved was concerned. The rest of infancy??? 0 for 3.

I pumped from the time he was 3 months (he'd only gained a little more than a pound) until he was 6 months, living on a cycle of pump, wash pumping things, bottle feed, wash bottle things, pump again. It was all I could do... especially in the middle of the night.

My Beloved had all but decided there was no reason to ever do this again, when I was pregnant... again.

I was mostly through my first trimester when we found out, and I wasn't sick. That was encouraging. Until the first day of my second trimester when I began throwing up. For the entire second trimester.

Still... as much as I do not enjoy pregnancy, I was open to more if the Lord would allow (read: I wanted more.) I was actually disappointed when we learned via ultrasound that we were having a girl. Not because I didn't want a little girl to raise, but because I figured the chances of getting a third baby were better if I didn't have a little girl yet. Now I knew this would probably be my last baby.

Then she came, and it was so much easier the second time around. The birth part at least.

But I was right. My Beloved was done. No more pregnancy. No more babies. I didn't agree, so I hoped quietly. Isn't that terrible? Finally I saw the error of my ways (that summer I realized what submission was really about) and stopped hoping we'd have more children. I knew that I needed accountability in that too, so we joined some friends who were having a yard sale and sold all the baby things we weren't still using. Clothing. High chair. Toys. Everything. Then we donated what was left.

Then October came. There was a new life within me once again. But a week later, that life was gone. We grieved, but I came away from that determined to be more careful. My doctor recommended that I not become pregnant for at least three months so that my body could recover. I didn't tell her that it wouldn't be a problem, but I was thinking it.

Then it happened again. Pregnant. (Read these posts for some details on how I was feeling.)

My Beloved is a God trusting man, and though things weren't going according to his plan, he adapts pretty quickly to God's. I am constantly encouraged by his faith in this way!

My sweet Little Man came and with him a peace that God would do in our lives what he would do. And that I could submit to my husband's decisions, whatever they were. I would be content with the little ones God had provided already, and, if in His will, I would welcome more children however and whenever they would come. He is sovereign after all... why should I know what is right for our family?


Then came a test of faith...

Labels: Life Lessons for Mommy, Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 7:54 AM 2 Comments

A Birth Story: Little Man

It all started Thursday morning, August 5th at my routine prenatal appointment. Everything looked good with baby, but mommy had an unusually high blood pressure--140/something. It could have been nothing, but since I was (I should say baby was) already two days overdue, the midwife was unwilling to take the risk. An induction was scheduled for Friday morning, 7:30am.

After a number of self started contractions Thursday afternoon and evening, and one last trip to the park as a family of four, we settled into bed.

Six o'clock came slowly for me as I was up a number of times, not with contractions, but with regular pregnancy discomforts. When the alarm did sound, I was ready--sort of. Friends of ours arrived with their 4 month old around 6:30am. He began work at 7, so they built in some time that morning for him to drop his wife and daughter at our home to stay with the kids while we were away (it was the one day we didn't have anyone available to stay with the kids... we were grateful they came!) Not long after their arrival, J left for work and I was filling L in on all I could think of. All the while, though, I was having more contractions, and stronger than the day before.

I woke Tornado and Sweet Pea at 7am so we could explain, again, where we were going and so that they could say good-bye to us. At 7:20, we were in the car and on the way. My contractions were closer together and requiring more of my concentration. It seemed like each turn we made came during one, making it impossible to both relax and keep myself upright at the same time. And I found that Dr. Bradley is right, contractions hurt more when you aren't completely relaxed... a lot more!

I did the crazy big girl thing and walked in from the parking lot and even forwent the wheel chair at the entrance. I didn't want quite that much attention this time around.

Our sweet nurse Nicole was in the birthcenter to greet us, showing us right to room 320 and getting us settled. As we walked into the room she turned and looked at me, "Let's get one thing straight," she said sternly, "I am not delivering this baby!"

"Ah," I said smiling, "you've read my chart." When Sweet Pea was born, the midwife didn't quite make it, and our nurse Mary was the one to deliver her.

Seemingly endless questions like "Do you have running water in your home" and "access to a car" were interrupted by contraction after contraction, at which time I would lay my head back, close my eyes and "stomach breath" to the best of my ability--just like it said in my book. This too seemed to reduce the pain. Throughout the morning, various nurses and midwives encouraged me in those moments when I'd "leave the room", as I'd overhear them saying to each other comments like, "she's doing so good" and, "isn't she good?!?" It at least made me feel like I was doing something right.

After a check by the midwifery student (Molly) and a chat with the midwife (Bonnie), we were alone. Just my sweet husband and me. There is something so special about laboring with my Love. He is always caring and sweet, but how it is amplified in labor when his desire to serve me is never greater.

He sits and stands nearby, taking pictures of anything he thinks I'll want later, holding my hand, telling me I'm doing great and that he loves me.

When they were putting in my IV (before the midwives came in actually), he hovered about staying out of the way, yet staying close and helpful to all. The first IV blew the vein, which I expected. I had warned her that when Sweet Pea was born it took five tries. She was determined it would not happen again and brought in another nurse to try. That one stuck with some extra care and special treatment, but it hurt, and the Penicillin hurt worse--for almost an hour! At that point, the IV was actually worse than the contractions.

Once the antibiotic was done (and my arm started feeling better), things quieted down in our room. For a while I was able to chat and be normal between contractions. But after a time, things progressed further. I would feel the contraction coming and begin my deep "stomach breathing." Once the contraction calmed some, I'd feel myself simply turn and lay my head over. I'm sure this was distressing to my sweet husband. He would ask if I was okay and I would give a tiny, barely noticeable nod. I was apparently in the next stage of labor.

I have no idea how long I was in this "stage" as I wasn't paying much attention to anything other than the contractions, which were coming anywhere from one to five (maybe) minutes apart. All of a sudden I was announcing, "I'm nauseous." My Beloved knew what this meant, but the nurse was asking if I needed a basin. She got it to me quickly, and just in time. I was contracting and throwing up as I heard My Beloved tell the nurse that this usually meant "transition." Next thing I knew I was shaking violently... then it was over. And for a few minutes things were lighter in the room.

Before long, though, it was intense again, and now I was hot. Unbearably hot. When Molly checked me, I was only 6 cm (1 more than the morning) and baby was still high. My Beloved was fanning me now and wiping my face with cool damp clothes. This felt great and made it endurable.

Bonnie and Molly were in to check on us and recommended using the birthing ball, saying that sometimes moving around helps to move the baby into the right position... speeding things along. It sounded like a good idea so they brought it in for me. When it came time to actually use it though, I declined. Contractions were coming so fast and so hard that I didn't want to be in between laying on the bed and leaning on the ball when one came. I was afraid I would find myself in a position I couldn't completely relax in... and I didn't know if I could take that.

After a second transition like period of throwing up, the contractions were even more intense. I was now moaning the exhale parts of many contraction's "stomach breaths." And I was ready for it all to be done. Unwilling to do it anymore, yet uninterested in alternatives.

The time came for a second dose of antibiotics (because of my positive GBS). A decision had to be made. The first round was immensely painful... almost unbearable with the contractions. Now they were going to do it again and I was barely making it through the contractions as it was. My sweet husband told me I could choose either way, but it was such a hard decision. I knew I didn't want it again... but what if I passed on it and something terrible happened to our baby? Finally, I decided. "I don't think I can handle it," I said to My Beloved. The decision was made... turns out, it didn't much matter.

Within minutes, my back pain was even worse than it had been, and I decided, finally, rather suddenly, that I wanted to lay on my side. I announced it, then felt the urgency to already be there as another contraction was already coming. I remember My Beloved trying to prop pillows behind my back for support, just as I wanted him to, but then was urgently asking (telling?) him to just push on me... push on my back... push... harder.

I'm not sure how many contractions I lay like that for (1?, 2?, 3?, or more), but it wasn't many. Before I knew it, the feeling I'd been waiting for had come (apparently I should have rolled over hours before!) My room was "full." My Beloved was with me of course, but my nurse, the midwife and the midwifery student had all been hanging out in our room , just watching and waiting. (I found out later that my nurse had asked Molly to stay close because she was afraid of having to deliver the baby herself! Isn't that great?!?)

"I feel like pushing," I said calmly to the room. Molly got up and, I think, said something about checking me. Then I said... not asked... "I'm pushing." And with as deep a breath as I could muster, I held a push for as long as I could. And they saw his head.

"I'm pushing again." I said (everyone was up now.) I heard someone (maybe my midwife Bonnie) tell me to just follow my body... which I was already doing, but I was encouraged to know that meant they were ready. I took a deep breath and held it as long as I could. Let it out, drew in another, held it and pushed some more. With one more held breath and push, his head was out. A moment later the next contraction was upon me and the deep breath holding and pushing resumed, bringing my baby boy into this world... in his bag. (The nurse was very excited!)

A second later they placed my purple boy on me, drying and wrapping him as best they could while the midwife team "finished up."

It's amazing how you can immediately feel like a new person. The energy I seemed to lack between contractions moments before had really just been stored so I was ready for each new contraction. All the work was over now and all my energy was restored so that I could focus it on my boy.

My precious baby boy was with us... perfect and healthy. Within fifteen minutes he was nursing, eyes looking around.

Labels: Pregnancy, Raising Children

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 7:04 AM 3 Comments

Not *Planning* on induction

... but things never do go exactly to plan, do they?

I had a prenatal appointment today and my blood pressure was high. They retested it after a little bit and it was down, but since I'm already overdue, my midwife said she'd rather not take the risk of preeclampsia. So... I'm officially scheduled for induction tomorrow morning, Friday, August 6th.

But... I'm also having some contractions today (more than I've been having), so I'm going to wait to award the winning title to our little game until I know whether today or tomorrow is the real day! :)

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 2:46 PM 2 Comments

... and Counting (a little game)

Ok, I'm forty weeks and counting! (I'm the one counting!) Today is the official due date... which to me means today is the only day I *know* I won't be having baby, right?!?

My Beloved snapped this quick picture for you all this morning before leaving for work. I don't know if it does justice or not. Sunday morning at church about a half dozen people came up to me to inform me that I was "really low" and "had dropped" and it surely "wouldn't/couldn't be long now". I decided right then that they were cursing me to being overdue in some way. We'll see just how badly. :)

On the plus side, I slept better last night than I have in a LONG time! Weeks at least! And the cherry on top is that Tornado slept later than I did! No 6:15 wake up call for this tired mamma. I was actually still in bed, and asleep, when the alarm went off at 8! Woo Hoo! (We revel in small victories around here these days!)

So... in honor of this little one who is, apparently, not quite ready to join us, I'm thinking a little game is in order. I promise no prize (unless I think of something and come up with the time in postpardum... hahaha) but the winner can bask in the satisfaction of being the winner! (I'm a giver!)

The game: How late will I go???

Some information:

• Today is my official due date.
• Tornado was one week late, Sweet Pea was two days early.
• We are not planning on our doctor's standard induction at the "one week late" mark.
• We may let them induce at two weeks overdue, but I don't know.
  

The question to answer (in the comments): How overdue will this baby be? (how many days is good enough)

Tie breaker: Any other info you want to guess... weight, time born, length, etc.


So there you have it... give it a go. Entertain me. And no, I won't be offended by extra far guesses. Are you a lurker??? Encourage this tired mamma by jumping in and playing along! I'd love to hear from all of my readers. It makes me smile!

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 10:48 AM 7 Comments

Still here

I woke up this morning from natural causes... ok, maybe not natural causes. Pregnancy causes is more like it. The point is, it wasn't labor that caused me to wake. It seems that each evening I hope I'll be in labor by morning. :) Not so far! The next step for my day is to hope I'll be in labor by evening.

It's not so much that I'm terribly impatient... the fact is that I'm somewhat overly patient for the first days of infancy (it sounds harder in my head to care for a newborn--not to mention newborn plus other kids once I'm home from the hospital--than to just do what I already know how to do).

It's more that I'm ready to have my body on the path to recovery. Laying in bed is a long arduous process... even if it's to sleep for the night. I wake up (after a bunch of wake ups through the night) to sore and painful hips and legs between 5-7am sometime... only to give in and move to the couch... which is only somewhat more comfortable. (I don't mean to complain... just to give explanation for my readiness!)

I can report that I finished my "waiting" project...

It took exactly one week, which means I had it done this past Sunday night. It's just taken this long to get a picture taken. I'm excited to have it finished and ready for cool weather so we can snuggle underneath it.

One fun tidbit about this quilt... the top is made up of fabric I already had on hand.

They are all fabrics I've used in other quilts.... quilts I've made for friends' wedding gifts. Now, each time I cuddle under it, I can think of those friends and smile (especially nice since since all those friends are far away now.)


And here's the edging that I was working on last week... all done! :)

It's a nice feeling!

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 9:25 AM 3 Comments

Some Recent Thoughts

In recent days a few things have occurred to me... so I thought I would share some of my random, yet somewhat related, thoughts from this past week.

• I'm about to have a baby... really, it's true. So far I've just been pregnant, but every once and a while it occurs to me that, sooner than later, I will have a newborn to care for.
  
• I'm about to have three children.
• I'm not sure how I feel about that.
• It sounds hard.
• I'm not patient enough with the two I already have.
• When the new baby is the age Sweet Pea is now, I'll have a 6 1/2 year old!
• Maybe I can do this after all.
• I'm about to have even less time than I think I have now.

Anyone else have these sorts of realizations with 2 1/2 weeks to go???

Labels: As it happens..., Pregnancy, Reflections

posted by ~Babychaser~ @ 1:38 PM 2 Comments